Writing is my drug

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Thu, 20 Dec 2012 14:29:55 -0500

Photo

Thu, 20 Dec 2012 14:29:45 -0500

In Caged

Sat, 14 Apr 2012 23:51:38 -0400

I live in fear
To this very day
Thanks to the men
Who sent me away

The days are cold
The nights are freezing
We all have lice
There is no dreaming

Only nightmares live here
During day and night
There is no escape now
There will be no knight

No one to save us
From this horrible zoo
No one to explain
This world is very new

They burn the bodies
Or toss them in ditches
They call the men kikes
And the women bitches

Now since the war is over
I have no where to go
I really just want to die
Or maybe overdose

If the nazis are gone
And Hitler is dead
Then why do I feel
Like I should be dead?

The Rain

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 23:00:15 -0400

The rain is beautiful
The rain is pure
It represents being clean
It represents life

The sky darkens
The sky turns grey
It begins to fall
It begins to wash

It will wash away the bad
It will bring back life
Tears from the heaven
Tears for the fallen

The dead still cry
The dead still weep
It’s for the world to see
It’s for you to understand

The rain has stopped
The tears have paused
Only for seconds
Only to return again

So Excited

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 22:56:38 -0400

My hearts racing
I know it’s imminent
My head is killing me
Pain only gets worse
Every time I breathe

I’ll ask God only once
I won’t do it twice
Kill me right here
Kill me right now

I’ve attempted before
To stop my heart
I’ve used ropes and razors
My father owns a gun
It’s time to put it to use

It takes no skill
I know I can do it
It won’t be hard
I’ll do it tonight

I’ll make my bed
Rest my body in it
Lay for an hour
Before I wreck it

I just need one bullet
It’s going to take one shot
Ooh i’m getting excited
Can you tell
Don’t you understand
This is big
I can’t wait!

I’ll always stay young
I’ll never become old
It’s a dream, I wish
That will come true!

I’m so happy
I’ll never feel pain
It will be so quick
This is my good bye
I hope you enjoyed my stay
I know I didn’t
Well I guess
I’ll see you soon

Counting Hours

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 22:56:24 -0400

Tick tock tick
Every second of every minute
Life goes on
And never stops

You are constantly moving
Forward in time
You can not redo what is passed
Your mistakes will always last

So take deep breaths
And count the hours
Till the time comes
When you can leave
This awful planet

Life After Death

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 22:50:37 -0400

The room is dark
It feels like I’m blind
The colors are lost
It’s cold inside

There is no hope
No way out
From this room
What can I do?

I can hear noises outside
The sounds of the world
Images are in my head
Ones from a happy place
From when I wasn’t dead

They mean nothing now
My world is old
There is no way back
No way home

I was promised eternal life
I was threatened for Hell
Who would have known
Neither were true

So I’ll be stuck here by myself
No one else with me
All alone very alone
Just with myself.

Fears

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 22:48:08 -0400

Everyone has at least one
They are always there
Even when you don’t know
They wait until you are weak
They use you to feed

You can count on them
Even more then your friends
They live in your head
And soon will eat you alive

You can try to hide
Or even run away
But from my experience
They will never leave

No matter how you act
They will be under your skin
Pay attention
For soon you will see
The worst thing is
Fearing fear it’s self

The Last Leaf

Fri, 06 Apr 2012 15:25:18 -0400

The last leaf
On the old tree
It’s been a year
Since she has died

She left me here alone
I miss the way she smiled
The way she laughed
When I told a joke
We always held hands
And kissed in public
I was all she wanted
She was all I needed
To make it in this world

I knew her for years
She was my best friend
As I was hers
We talked everyday
We loved each other

Now she is gone
I miss her so much
I am lost without her
I want her back

She was beautiful
Hair that flowed
Eyes that sparkled
Her lips were soft
I told her all the time
How amazing she looked

I don’t think
I can live another year
Without my girl
She was my world

So the last leaf is ready to fall
This means the end of the year
It’s time to start over
A chance to start off fresh
But for me
It’s just another year
Without her by my side

A Normal Life

Sun, 01 Apr 2012 01:04:54 -0400

Another day
Just another hour
I’m going no where
In this dead end job

I wake up every morning
Put on my uniform
And walk out my door

The whole ride there
I can only think about
What life would be like
If I were gone

I don’t care if I were dead
Or just disappeared
I would be gone for a long time
I bet no one would care
Not even shed a tear

Now I’m here
At this dead end job
No wife
No kid
Just an empty life

Everyone treats me like shit
At this pointless job
I serve food to fatties all day
I get paid nothing
And tips
Forget about it
The people are greedy now
So stingy with money
Thanks to this economy

By the end of the day
The last couple hours
I watch people
Live there life

There is always so much drama
So much crime
Everyone’s life is always
More exciting
Then mine

Now I’m tired
Eyes feel so heavy
For now all my thoughts
All my ideas
Will fade for the night
And tomorrow will be
Like every other day
In my normal life.

Life after death (review)

Sat, 31 Mar 2012 03:17:26 -0400

I wanted to write a poem on how it would be like after death. I imagined neither Heaven or Hell existed. And what it would be like just to be alone in darkness. When I talk about the sounds and images those were just memories he had before he died. The whole point of this was just to show a scary look on the after life and the idea of being alone forever.

Shit

Fri, 30 Mar 2012 16:21:34 -0400

This is a poem
Not one that tells a story
Or one about love
Or any of that shit
I just got bored
So I began to write

I don’t even care
That this poem doesn’t rhyme
Because I suck at rhyming
And I think it’s overrated

I’m just going to go on
Until I run out of shit to say
Yes I called it shit
Because that’s all it is
That’s all that ever comes out
From our teen mouths
No one cares
About what we say
Even if it’s important
All they say is we complain

Sorry if this rhymed
I didn’t mean to rhyme
It just happened
So this is the end
Well almost at least
You read the shit I had to say
It wasn’t much
It was on the spot
But I hope this poem
At least touched a shit piece
Of your heart

Burnt Memories

Thu, 29 Mar 2012 23:20:12 -0400

I will burn it down tonight
All the memories she holds
All the fear she hides

I’ve known her since I was young
My daddy didn’t build her
But he sure did destroy her

All those horrible days
I just wanted to die
It started off small
But as I grew older
The beatings became more
I would go to school everyday
With bruises and marks
I would tell my friends it was nothing
And of course they believed the lies

I will never forget what he did
I wish I could
Instead I’ve been scarred
Everyday was a new painful memory
I would put a brave face on
During the day
When the stars appeared
The sobbing begun

So one day I had enough
I grabbed the kitchen blade
I woke him up
And with a stab
I put him to sleep

Tonights the night
I burn it all away.

The Forgotten Girl

Thu, 29 Mar 2012 23:01:04 -0400

You can tell
By the scars on her wrist
The way she does her makeup
It’s all for you
Just for you

You ignore her everyday
You try to play cool
To impress your friends
But now you realize
You like her too

It’s too late
The damage is done
It’s been a week now
And she is nowhere to be found

You see what you’ve done?
Her life is ended
Since you tried to play tough
Do you feel tough now?

Do you know how she felt
For a year or two
She loved you for you
You are a fool

Everyday when she woke up
She hoped you changed
She threw on a dress
And hoped you noticed

She would write in her journal
About everyday
All of it’s true
And all of it hurts
It’s mostly cause of you

It was a struggle
She stayed up all night
Picking out clothes
To catch your eye

But one day she couldn’t
She couldn’t take it anymore
She didn’t want to pretend
Pretend you changed anymore
So she stayed home drunk
Drunk with sadness
She grabbed her fathers gun
The gun that put the pain away

I hope you now know
What you’ve done
Who she was
Who she loves

Hayley

Thu, 29 Mar 2012 22:56:54 -0400

This is your poem
I wrote it for you
Let us get started
It’s from me to you

Hayley you say you
Have some disorders
But it’s okay
Because you are you
Even when people
Tell you what to do.

You are beauty
The way you are
Please do not change
Do not even starve

I hope you know
The world would cry
If you left today
I beg you don’t die

I know you feel sad
Most of the time
So when you do
Just remember
I am here for you